In accordance with my one-blog-a-week pledge, I am due to write a post today, or else my New Year's resolution shall be broken and moral decay will surely ensue. Yet I really don't know what to write about.
The past week has been quite good, in terms of personal enjoyment. I can't help but feel that round about now, I'm undergoing some sort of formative interval; I distinctly feel my attitude towards things changing, in some ways for the better. I think I may be happier, and definitely more antisocial. Yet the word 'antisocial' has such negative connotations; in an effort to find a more appropriate word, I visited thesaurus.com to find a suitable synonym, yet nearly all those available were similarly negative. I don't think the term is deserving of malignment; at least in my case, the absense of social aspects in my life provides happiness and, quite frankly, convenience. I say this all with no hyperbole. Though I have a fondness for my current, small group of friends, I have no desire whatsoever to obtain any more; other than of the romantic variety, but that futile wish is perhaps deserving of its own blog. I completely detest the idea of parties, and recently facebook, for want of a better phrase, is getting right on my tits. Though I enjoy college, I would much prefer it if those awful gaps between lessons were eradicated and instead the timetable consisted of straight lessons, so I could just go home early and get my work done, not having to waste time standing in the corner of a cretin-filled cafeteria. This wasn't really a problem until a few months ago, as my college library came equipped with a 'silent zone'; a wondrous workplace- for what it lacked in size, it made up with the golden rule of complete silence. However, building work has closed it for the foreseeable future, and part of me really misses it.
Anyway, back on topic; elsewhere in these ambigious developments, I've finally started to properly enjoy videogames again (fuelled partly by the announcement of all sort of great software for the Wii U- sorry, I'll stop being geeky), and have obtained a newfound ambivalence to my studies. If I'm using the word correctly, this means that I've gained some degree of previously absent confidence about them, but on the other hand, am scared shitless at the prospect of exams coming up relatively soon. Though my practise assessments and such haven't indicated any real areas of concern, half the time I'm convinced I'm not going to reach my personal aim of getting As in everything. At the peak of this madness, I got a bit annoyed at getting a 7.5/10 for a practise exam question, which as we all know is 0.5 of a point off an A. I'M GOING TO FAIL. But on the other hand (this is back to the first hand- not some conceptual third hand. That would just be silly.), I'm starting to view the idea of revision as less of a hassle, and more of a vital component of my weekly life. Though I generally reject the idea of duty, I'm a strong believer of the idea that so-called 'shade' is needed in our lives to enable appreciation of the 'light'. As is often the case, I have yet to practise what I preach; in the first day of my 'big revision 3-day weekend', I have done precisely 0% revision, 0% homework and 100% piss arsing about with videogames.
So perhaps I should go and do some revision. Then there's the homework. And that Cambridge essay isn't going to write itself.
Stop distracting me!